Slow Me Down

This song by Emmy Rossum is pretty awesome. The main subject of the song is that before life flys by, without you taking in all the details, you have to slow down, before you realize how much you've really missed. It seems like its all about rushing, these days. Doing the most with your time as possible, from 6 in the morning to 11 at night. It almost doesn't sound fair, that its almost human nature to leave NO spare room between one event and the next, except time penciled in for transportation. And when there's so much rushing, there's hardly time to enjoy what's going on around you, only time to think about what you will be doing next.

It's a sad thought, to think that a moment only comes once, and then it never comes again. And there's no telling, sometimes, just how important that moment really is... And then later on in life you think back, and you realize how much you would give to have that time back. Why isn't time designed that way? Why can't we go back and relive our moments in other ways except memories? I'm not sure, and I don't have the slightest clue. Maybe so we learn to actually appreciate every moment... I don't know.

I complain about a lot in my life, right now. And I realize that. But I know that later on, I'll look back, and just... smile because it happened...

Revelation

It's pretty amazing, the effect music can have on someone. It can send chills, envoke hidden emotions, draw tears from the corner of any eye. It's a non-concrete thing. You can't touch music, you can't see music. You can just FEEL it. And maybe that's why its so fascinating and comforting to people. Music can be made anywhere, from a classroom to home... and no matter what, it can touch your heart.

The Light You Shine

Everyone influences someone else. Whether you're the outgoing one, or the kid that sits in the corner, each and every single beating heart reminds another beating heart that there's always a different rhythm. I've never really though about how I influence people. I hope that I have a positive effect on people, but I'm sure that at times, that doesn't happen. Ideally, I'd want to be a role model to my peers, to show them that it IS possible to stay out of drama, to keep good grades, to be involved, and to not do anything illegal. I'd like to show people that life can be just as fun without drugs, without sex, without drama.

Maybe, one day, I'll get a true insight as to how I influence people. And when and if that happens, I'll just... smile beacuse it happened...

Don't Criticize

You really don't know whats going on in someone else's life, when you say something.

For example, I have a friend who gets awful grades, and sleeps all the time in class. You'd never know that as a junior in high school, he works 35 hours a week.

I have another very close friend of mine who I love dearly, and he dropped out of high school his junior year... but you'd never know that he dropped out to support his family because his father is on disability and his mother couldn't find any better jobs because she doesn't have a degree.

One of my best friends in the entire world is an extremely talented gymnast and just a wonderful person in general, and you'd never know that she forgets just how beautiful she is sometimes... and when you joke that someone's fat... it doesn't help. She's FAR from fat, she's perfect, but when people make jokes, they don't know.

There seems to be a common joke that this homework is so hard, that it makes people want to shoot themselves in the head. Well, I've heard this said to a girl whose mother committed suicide by a gunshot to the head.

People really forget just how hard life is for some people, and what they've been through. I hate that people think its okay to call anyone fat or stupid or lazy, regardless of if its true or not. You never know what's going on in someones life.

Who Knows Where the Wind Blows

A New Year has so much potential. That's why, if I'm thinking correctly, the symbol for a new year is a baby. It's just beginning, and has the next twelve months to grow. (Why said baby is reborn every year, I can't explain)

But thinking about the next twelve months... a lot can change. In March, I turn seventeen, I'll have my full license, and will be able to drive as many of my friends that I want. I'll probably make new friends, and grow apart from old ones. I could lose someone in my family, or maybe a new family member could come along. Hopefully, I'll decide what college I want to go to, and what I'd like to major in, to set up the rest of my life. I'll go to prom, hopefully with the perfect dress and a date that I truly care for, and take a billion pictures. I'll leave junior year behind, and welcome the summer, full of cheerleading and work and friends. My last summer in high school. I'll be a senior cheerleader, which means I'll be making a lot more decisions. I'll hopefully lose weight, too.

Then senior year will start. Wow. It's scary just thinking about it. I'll start thinking about graduation, college, moving out... Something I'm not prepared to think of right now. Honestly... there's a lot I don't want to think about right now. 2011 could bring a lot of good things... but also could bring a lot of bad events. Hopefully, no matter what happens, I'll be able to just... smile because it happened...

Remember

Well, it's here. 2011. It seems like just a few months ago, we were celebrating New Years last year, readjusting to the second sememester after the long Christmas break... It's crazy! Time flies, and a lot has happened in the last year. My cheerleading team went to KAPOS, won, then went to state, where we would have placed seventh, but a girl wore a necklace, so we placed thirteenth. Then, a new relationship, and the quick end of that relationship... Easter, tryouts, conditioning. Running for what seemed like forever, getting a five minute break, then doing more aerobic excercises. Meeting new people, breaking away from old friends. Drama!!!!!!!!! And plenty of it. A long summer, then a warm fall. Summer reading stress, beginning of the year stress. APUSH kicking my butt. Meeting new people again, and another relationship, that's still lasting. Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years... Lessons learned, points proved, and troubles forgotten.